Grateful Sunday 40

I went into this week knowing it was going to be busy as my parents were coming to visit. It got a little busier than I expected, but it has been a good week. I have stayed stable for weeks now and life is good.

This week I am grateful

291. For being able to host big birthday parties for the girls.

292. For my parents safely arriving here. 

293. For the help my parents gives us with the house and the kids. 

294. For finally getting to see the midnight sun this year. 

295. For being able to run 20 minutes straight. 

296. For the support I experience in my ups and downs of being bipolar. 

297. For enough firewood for the next winter. 

298. For the beautiful weather this past week. 

299. For my husbands patience with having a sick child and having my parents visiting.

300. For having a place for my thoughts to be written down. 

This next week will be even busier as I am preparing for the two birthday parties. 

What are you grateful for this week and what are you looking forward to next week?

Illness in the house

And the doctors verdict is virus. Isabel will have to ride it out. She seems better though already.
So for two days she has been home from school, now is a three day weekend due to pentecost. She should be fine after that.

I'm getting anxious about traveling now. Feel like I need to start packing, but I think I will try to wait till monday as it will be two weeks till we leave then. Considering I have so much to do next week I will have to write down a few lists of things to get done each day. Otherwise I will get really stressed and stress and bipolar don't mix very well.

A good thing now is that tonight I will get to put furniture back out on my deck as the paint will be dry then. My dad though is thinking we should paint the beams under the deck too, so I might not be done yet.

I am sort of on a shopping stop. We are saving up money for the US trip. But there are so many things I would like to buy right now. New patio furniture, pillows for the old ones, new clothes and some toys for the kids to have outside. I found the perfect furniture a few days ago, but it is so expensive. Today I found some really nice clothes, but it's just too much. I can't wait to go to the states and be able to at least shop for some clothes. Most of my summer attire now is at least four seasons old and totally worn out.

How long does your summer clothes last?

Drifting along

It is amazing how much can get done when your parents come to visit.
I was planning on painting inside my home, but ended up painting our deck instead.
The deck really needed it as it was bleached by the sun and worn by all the traffic and weather.
I just didn't think we could afford it, but my dad decided that he would buy the paint and help me paint too. So we have now spent three days painting the deck and I just have the stairs to the front door left to do. Guess I will get to that tomorrow.

This month I have to arrange four birthday parties. Sofies birthday is on the 26th of June and Isabels is on the 1st of July, both after we have left for the US. We have therefore decided to celebrate their birthdays with their friends next weekend and that makes for one party saturday and one on sunday. The weekend after that we will have a family party for them together. When we arrive in the US we will have a big birthday party for them over there too. They are two very lucky girls for sure.  Today I got out the invitations to Isabel's party and tomorrow I will do Sofies  invitations.

There is so much to do getting the barn ready for partying. I have to make tables and get enough chairs. Decorate and get the food ready. Lets just say I am getting a little bit stressed now.

My dad has spent a lot of time cutting down firewood and I have spent a lot of time moving the firewood for the winter to empty the wood drying room for the new wood my dad is bringing in. It is a never-ending job as I can't see the end to it anytime soon.

The cleaning will have to wait together with the painting of the hallways, but I will have to get some sewing done.

I am still thinking of posts to write for this blog, but I have no idea what to focus on.

Anyone have any ideas for my blog?

Post it weekend

Grateful Sunday 39

It is a beautiful morning. Everyone is still sleeping. We are having a long weekend with Thursday and Friday off. Staying home this weekend just taking it easy. Feeling blessed in so many ways and so grateful for

281. The beautiful weather we are having.
282. The forrest getting greener every day.
283. Being done with the yard work that needed be done this spring. Although I have not been able to make a vegetable garden this year either.
284. My husband getting down on the floor with the youngest one and making her a fancy railroad with our Brio train sets.
285. Being able to run almost 20 minutes straight.
286. Quiet mornings alone while everyone else is sleeping.
287. Being able to see good friends again and spending time with them.
288. Knowing my parents will come to visit on Monday and stay a while.
289. The energy I am having, but still knowing my medicine is doing its job.
290. Knowing that I have so many friends in the US who are looking forward to seeing me this summer.

What are you grateful for this week?

Being Bipolar

This post is inspired by Amy at New Nostalgia who wrote about her anxiety disorder since May is Mental awareness month.

I was diagnosed with Bipolar in the spring of last year. For years I was struggling with depressions and some periods where I felt on top of the world as I would describe it. I managed for years and had long periods where I felt fine too. A few times did I ask for help. Once when I was a teen I was so depressed that I asked for help, but by the time I got to see a therapist I was fine again and the therapist told me I had nothing there to do. Then again when I was living in the US and my therapist there diagnosed me with depression and treated that without medicine and as soon as I felt better she let me go.

Spring of last year I got sick again with a deep depression and I had to ask for help. I got to talk to a psychologist who took me seriously and who didn't just dismiss me when I started to feel better. I was medicated with an antidepressant, but these medicines has a tendency to trigger periods of mani or highs as I call it. My psychologist got to observe this and listening to me tell how I all my life had had ups ending in downs he diagnosed me with bipolar.

I stopped the antidepressants and after swinging a lot unmedicated I finally got to try some medicine for treating bipolar. One medicine made me so sick that this year I felt that I missed out on January and February by being both depressed and sick because of side effects. Right now I am on a medicine that works but I have two psychologists keeping track of my medicine and the effect I am having of them to see if I need more or a different medicine.

We are also treating some other issues I have with anxiety and social phobia. It feels good to finally get things sorted out and to feel a little bit more normal.

This winter and spring I have attended a class for Bipolar where we learn to live with our diagnosis. It is nice to be able to talk to others with the same diagnose and finally feel that we are somewhat normal in all our ups and downs.

Things that we have learned so far is that stress is bad for us (knew that), having a regular schedule is important both to not take on too much in manic periods and not to go into apathy in depressive periods (that is a little hard to do for me at least), and there are more but most important is to ask for help from family and friends (easy since I have been open about this from the beginning).

I am learning to live with my Bipolar self and my family is learning to help me. The world is finally understanding mental illnesses more and more and you can find help.
Life is finally good in it ups and downs.

This is why Mental awareness is important to me.

Spring

Spring is finally here. It does come a little late, but when it arrives it comes fast.
With spring the bugs arrives driving Sofie crazy as she is so scared of flies.
With spring the trampoline comes back outside for the kids to play and not to forget the bikes.
With spring all outside chores needs be done and you pray for sunny weather to get it out of the way.

So far I have raked the lawn removing all the branches that fell off the trees this winter in all the storms that came by. I have removed a ton of dog poop that were hidden in the snow. I have worked in one of my flower beds. And I have started refilling our firewood stock.

Jesse has started cutting down trees that needed to go either because they were to big or too close to the fences. And he is looking into things that he can do to the house.

The kids have put up a show behind the garage, playing with water and dirt making apple juice and cakes to sell. And today Sofie and her best friend kept riding their bikes back and from visiting each other all day.

It is such a freedom living here and we love it.

Now I just have to find more projects to do as the weather is supposed to stay nice next week too.
My parents arrive on Monday and will stay for three weeks and knowing my dad he has lots of projects in mind for our home. He likes it that way and at almost 70 of age he does not know how to sit still.

My next projects will have to be to plant flowers at the graveyard and at my home.
Paint the second coat in the hallway upstairs as it is almost a year and half since the first coat was painted.
Paint the hallway downstairs and rehang all the pictures on the walls.
Clean the kitchen and the living room.
Wash windows.
I also have a sewing project to get done for work and some knitting projects to get done.

What kind of plans do you have?