A long time ago

A long time ago I started a blog and it kept me sane for three years while living in the states dealing with my youngest daughters illness and my homesickness. Then for two years I was quiet before I for a brif time wrote 25 posts in 2014 ending it while on vacation in the US.

I don’t know why I stopped writing other than somewhat feeling embarrassed that I wrote a blog and overwhelmed over the demands I put on myself in regards to the posts I wrote. 

Now I am thinking I should get back to writing again as a way to keep track of my thoughts and my days. I am not working at the time being and to keep myself busy now I think writing again would be good. Maybe also finding back to my camera again and play with taking pictures would be good. 

It seems like I had 58 followers at a time and I hope some of you are still out there. It would be nice knowing that there is someone out there reading this, but for the most part I will be writing for myself and my own wellbeing. 

Wellcome back.

Carrousel

Sometimes my life feels like a carrousel.

It goes round and round with its ups and downs. 

Today we went to the zoo and the kids got to ride on a carrousel there. 

We have been busy while being on vacation. 

Shopping and sightseeing. 

Visit to the beach.

Birthday party and hanging out with friends. 

It is hectic.

I'm having a hard time finding time to everyone and everything. 

I think I'm up rather than down. 

Turning around faster and faster. 

Tomorrow we will divide up.

My cousin and I will be downtown. 

Sightseeing and visiting the art museum. 

I am just hoping to be able to visit with more friends. 

 My carrousel keeps turning around. 

Not willing to stop anytime soon. 

The trip

Family

I have some very good friends.

For me they are family.

They want me in their lives. 

They accept me for who I am

and when I'm down they try to bring me up.

They love me for who I am 

and does not try to change me. 

My family is a mix of blood relatives

and friends who have chosen me.

I am blessed.

Sunshine

So far this summer the weather have been dreary. 

We had a week or so with sun and warm temperatures. 

The rest of the time it has been gray and rainy. 

We are so excited to go to Seattle.

The weather service reports really nice weather when we come. 

We are in need of some sunny weather. 

I wanted to go out running today.

The rain and wind made be stay inside. 

Found this quote on Pintrest.

It reminded me that I need to carry my own sunshine on the inside. 

A smile in my heart.

Random thoughts

Worrying

I saw my therapist today and we reflected upon my habit of worrying about days past and days coming. I am a worrying person and it sure does steel me of strength. 

I worry about what others are thinking of me. I worry if they like me or not. I worry that others might get angry with me. I worry that it is my responsibility to make everyone happy. I feel like everything that goes wrong around me is all my fault. 

My mind knows I am not responsible in any way for other peoples happiness, but my body disagrees.  I know that what people think of me is not my problem as long as I am myself. If people don't like me then they can stay away from me and I will leave them alone. I know that most of the time it isn't my fault what happens, but still my body takes responsibility for all of it. 

Every day I spend so much strength and energy on this that I am constantly tired. My heart is almost always racing and I have a hard time breathing. My mind is racing with thoughts of what I should do or what I should have done next time I meet or see someone. I just can't stop myself from doing so. It might be normal to some point, but not to the extend I do it and I know it.

I am always working on ways to avoid these thoughts and ways of reacting, but it is difficult on my own. After this summer my therapist and I will work on new strategies on managing this. 

Then maybe I will be able to stop worrying so much and finally start living life to the fullest. 

What will I do.

I am at a cross roads. 

What will I be in my career. 

I got an education.

Teacher.

In religion.

I have a job.

Just till September.

Then what will I do.

I have applied.

But never heard back.

I don't dare call myself.

Having anxiety.

Of calling or visiting.

Makes it hard.

To find a job.

 Or get connections.

I have a job.

Writing plans. 

It will be over.

Will I get to teach then.

Will I be able to handle teaching.

I don't know.

What will I do?

What talents should I rely upon?

In finding a new job.

Vacation now.

Grateful Sunday 40

I went into this week knowing it was going to be busy as my parents were coming to visit. It got a little busier than I expected, but it has been a good week. I have stayed stable for weeks now and life is good.

This week I am grateful

291. For being able to host big birthday parties for the girls.

292. For my parents safely arriving here. 

293. For the help my parents gives us with the house and the kids. 

294. For finally getting to see the midnight sun this year. 

295. For being able to run 20 minutes straight. 

296. For the support I experience in my ups and downs of being bipolar. 

297. For enough firewood for the next winter. 

298. For the beautiful weather this past week. 

299. For my husbands patience with having a sick child and having my parents visiting.

300. For having a place for my thoughts to be written down. 

This next week will be even busier as I am preparing for the two birthday parties. 

What are you grateful for this week and what are you looking forward to next week?

Illness in the house

And the doctors verdict is virus. Isabel will have to ride it out. She seems better though already.
So for two days she has been home from school, now is a three day weekend due to pentecost. She should be fine after that.

I'm getting anxious about traveling now. Feel like I need to start packing, but I think I will try to wait till monday as it will be two weeks till we leave then. Considering I have so much to do next week I will have to write down a few lists of things to get done each day. Otherwise I will get really stressed and stress and bipolar don't mix very well.

A good thing now is that tonight I will get to put furniture back out on my deck as the paint will be dry then. My dad though is thinking we should paint the beams under the deck too, so I might not be done yet.

I am sort of on a shopping stop. We are saving up money for the US trip. But there are so many things I would like to buy right now. New patio furniture, pillows for the old ones, new clothes and some toys for the kids to have outside. I found the perfect furniture a few days ago, but it is so expensive. Today I found some really nice clothes, but it's just too much. I can't wait to go to the states and be able to at least shop for some clothes. Most of my summer attire now is at least four seasons old and totally worn out.

How long does your summer clothes last?

Drifting along

It is amazing how much can get done when your parents come to visit.
I was planning on painting inside my home, but ended up painting our deck instead.
The deck really needed it as it was bleached by the sun and worn by all the traffic and weather.
I just didn't think we could afford it, but my dad decided that he would buy the paint and help me paint too. So we have now spent three days painting the deck and I just have the stairs to the front door left to do. Guess I will get to that tomorrow.

This month I have to arrange four birthday parties. Sofies birthday is on the 26th of June and Isabels is on the 1st of July, both after we have left for the US. We have therefore decided to celebrate their birthdays with their friends next weekend and that makes for one party saturday and one on sunday. The weekend after that we will have a family party for them together. When we arrive in the US we will have a big birthday party for them over there too. They are two very lucky girls for sure.  Today I got out the invitations to Isabel's party and tomorrow I will do Sofies  invitations.

There is so much to do getting the barn ready for partying. I have to make tables and get enough chairs. Decorate and get the food ready. Lets just say I am getting a little bit stressed now.

My dad has spent a lot of time cutting down firewood and I have spent a lot of time moving the firewood for the winter to empty the wood drying room for the new wood my dad is bringing in. It is a never-ending job as I can't see the end to it anytime soon.

The cleaning will have to wait together with the painting of the hallways, but I will have to get some sewing done.

I am still thinking of posts to write for this blog, but I have no idea what to focus on.

Anyone have any ideas for my blog?

Being Bipolar

This post is inspired by Amy at New Nostalgia who wrote about her anxiety disorder since May is Mental awareness month.

I was diagnosed with Bipolar in the spring of last year. For years I was struggling with depressions and some periods where I felt on top of the world as I would describe it. I managed for years and had long periods where I felt fine too. A few times did I ask for help. Once when I was a teen I was so depressed that I asked for help, but by the time I got to see a therapist I was fine again and the therapist told me I had nothing there to do. Then again when I was living in the US and my therapist there diagnosed me with depression and treated that without medicine and as soon as I felt better she let me go.

Spring of last year I got sick again with a deep depression and I had to ask for help. I got to talk to a psychologist who took me seriously and who didn't just dismiss me when I started to feel better. I was medicated with an antidepressant, but these medicines has a tendency to trigger periods of mani or highs as I call it. My psychologist got to observe this and listening to me tell how I all my life had had ups ending in downs he diagnosed me with bipolar.

I stopped the antidepressants and after swinging a lot unmedicated I finally got to try some medicine for treating bipolar. One medicine made me so sick that this year I felt that I missed out on January and February by being both depressed and sick because of side effects. Right now I am on a medicine that works but I have two psychologists keeping track of my medicine and the effect I am having of them to see if I need more or a different medicine.

We are also treating some other issues I have with anxiety and social phobia. It feels good to finally get things sorted out and to feel a little bit more normal.

This winter and spring I have attended a class for Bipolar where we learn to live with our diagnosis. It is nice to be able to talk to others with the same diagnose and finally feel that we are somewhat normal in all our ups and downs.

Things that we have learned so far is that stress is bad for us (knew that), having a regular schedule is important both to not take on too much in manic periods and not to go into apathy in depressive periods (that is a little hard to do for me at least), and there are more but most important is to ask for help from family and friends (easy since I have been open about this from the beginning).

I am learning to live with my Bipolar self and my family is learning to help me. The world is finally understanding mental illnesses more and more and you can find help.
Life is finally good in it ups and downs.

This is why Mental awareness is important to me.

Changes in my life

I just sat down to read a few of the last posts I wrote before I all of the sudden just stopped. It is funny how into it I was for a while and then it got all sporadic and then nothing. I do know why though. The stress of trying to sell our condo, running our MOPS group and trying to stay on top of everything concerning moving to Norway was taking its toll on me and I was slowly going into a depression again.

I wrote this a year ago. Just before going into such a deep depression that I had to ask for help. So much was going on around me and I finally felt I couldn’t handle it all anymore. 

The last two years in the US were very stressful for me and my family. Sofie was sick almost all the time, we were struggling financially and we decided to move back to Norway again. 

Spring of 2012 were especially hectic as I not only were dealing with things at home, but I was running a MOPS group with my friends and in the process of selling our condo we constantly had people running in and out wanting to see our place, which meant that I had to have it looking perfect all the time. 

We finally got the condo sold, moved in with my mother in law, packed everything we could into 32 boxes and sold off everything else. Then we moved to Norway on June 27th 2012 after saying goodbye to all our family and wonderful friends at a big party the day before. 

In Norway we moved in with my aunt and uncle. They were wonderful, but it was hard living at times eight people under one roof, but by Christmas we were able to buy a house only 1.5 mile down the road from my family and move in. 

My husband started working at a local grocery store and quickly advanced there. Now he is a store manager at a competing store. I started working as a substitute at two different schools, but by march 2013 I was going into a deep depression and had to ask for help. 

With the support of doctors, psykatrist, and my family and friends I was able to come out of it by the summer and over the summer by careful examination of my shifting moods, I was diagnosed with bipolar. 

I have chosen to be open about this as I am still me and this is now a part of me and it has been for many years, being undiagnosed. 

I hope now that I will be back at writing again as it is really helping me being creative. 

Health Goals

This is the year where I will

This past year my health has been declining due to my allergies and the stress in my life.

This new year I will take charge of my allergies by using any and all tools that I have against them. That may be by using my Neti pot, my allergy medicine and my asthma medicine a lot more than what I would normally do which really just means that I would follow doctors orders. I know I should always follow doctors orders when it comes to medicine use and by doing so I might not have experienced the decline in my health. As long as I can just get my allergies and asthma under control I might be able to avoid all these upper airway infections I have been having this past year.

Which brings me to the next point of starting running again. In August of 2010 I started to run by using the program of from Couch potato to 5K. By Thanksgiving I had gotten up to 4K and then I got sick. Since then I have only done a few runs and mostly just long hikes, but I know I can still do 3K without a problem.

It is just a matter of mindset

This fall I started the 30 minute workout program by Jillian Michaels and made it to week two when my knees started to give out on me. I want to get started again on it, but modify it a little to save my knees and at least not give up.

I also need to eat better. Smaller servings, more fruit and vegetables, less soda and unhealthy snacks. I still have a few extra pounds I need to loose and although I will try not to focus to much on it, it would still be nice to loose them and get down to pre pregnancy weight again.

My Goals are

• Use my medicine to control my allergy and asthma
• Use my Neti pot to keep infections away
• Start running again and make it to a 5K
• Start doing my 30 minute workout with Jillian Michaels
• Eat better and control my intake more
• And finally start doing Gymnastics again

My inspiration found on pinterest

How to be a better runner.

50 Random Questions with my answers to them

I found this on a blog I stumbled upon today called Marc and Angel Hack Life

These questions have no right or wrong answers.

Because sometimes asking the right questions is the answer.

1. How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are? 25, I don’t know why, but it just sounds right.
2. Which is worse, failing or never trying? Never trying is worse than failing as you would never know if you could actually make it without ever trying.
3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do? Because we always think about all the things that we should do which is usually things we don’t like, but we never feel like we have the right to do what we do like because we don’t feel like we deserve it without doing what we don’t like first.
4. When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done? Unfortunately yes. I make a lot of plans to do things, but rarely make the time to actually doing it.
5. What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world? I would like to make sure everyone was well educated especially in geography, languages and history.
6. If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich? Helping people and getting to know new people all the time. Maybe by running a coffee shop/bakery somewhere, having it me a meeting place for everyone.
7. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing? I believe in what I am doing which is raising my children, but I am not settling for what I am doing as I want to do more and this year I will go back to Norway to start teaching again. 
8. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently? That would mean that I have less than 8 years left to live and if that was it I would travel more, sing more and dance more, wait that is exactly what my plan is for the next 8 years.
9. To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken? Up until I moved here to the US I pretty much controlled the course of my life, but then when I came here I just had to trust that God knew the path I should take when all my plans got washed away. After almost 6 years here I find that my life again is going onto a path that I can control somewhat, but I have also learned to give the reigns to God and trust him in guiding me.
10. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? I think I feel it about 50/50 there. I am a perfectionist and I want things done right, but I also want to do the right things.
11. You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire.  They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend.  The criticism is distasteful and unjustified.  What do you do? I speak up and ask them how well they know this person and then I call them on it and tell them how it is.
12. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? Stand your ground and be a friend.
13. Would you break the law to save a loved one? No, I don’t think so.
14. Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity? With my dad all the time. I though him insane when he insisted on getting electricity at our summer house by building his own water generator, still I admire his creativity and persistence in making it and love the fact that I can charge my computer while being there.
15. What’s something you know you do differently than most people? I know I live a less structured life than most of my friends. They have specific days for almost everything and have a hard time doing anything else on those days. I do like to do my grocery shopping on Mondays, but if a friend wants to meet me for a coffee or a play date I will make do with what I have at home and do my grocery shopping another day.
16. How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy? Not everyone likes crafting or baking. I don’t like playing video games, but it sure makes my hubby happy when he gets to play his.
17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do?  What’s holding you back? I really want to work as a teacher and use my education. What is holding me back is the fact that I have to go back to school to get my teaching certificate here in the US to be able to teach here. That is something I can’t afford to do and therefore I have not been able to teach since I moved here right after graduating from the university.
18. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of? Except for a lot of stuff that I need to get rid of before moving? Probably the anger I have against my mother in law for the way she has treated me since we moved here.
19. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why? Norway, it is my home country and I will be able to get a job there as a teacher.
20. Do you push the elevator button more than once?  Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster? There is always a chance that it didn’t register the first time.
21. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton? I would be happy if I were somewhere in between, but if I have to choose I think I would like to be a joyful simpleton because at least I would live a good life.
22. Why are you, you? Because I like me and God created me this way for a reason.
23. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? I always try my hardest to be the kind of friend I would love to have, I just wish I was better at listening.
24. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you? Losing touch with a good friend who lives near me because I always feel like it is my fault either by not being a good enough friend or that they just don’t like me which to me is quite painful.
25. What are you most grateful for? I am most grateful for my husband who loves me no matter what and for my two beautiful girls.
26. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones? I would rather lose all of my old memories and be able to make new ones.
27. Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first? Yes.
28. Has your greatest fear ever come true? Trying to think of what my greatest fear is, no.
29. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset?  Does it really matter now? No, but I still wish that we had not sold the house and moved here.
30. What is your happiest childhood memory?  What makes it so special? What comes to mind now is waking up on Christmas Eve and coming out of my bedroom where through the glass door to the living room I could see the Christmas tree all decorated with the lights all shining. I would stand there for a moment before opening the door and going in to see all the gifts under the tree. The anticipation was tickling like butterflies in my stomach and still I had to wait till after 6 pm to open any gifts. My parents would get up and we would eat a wonderful breakfast, visit my grandparents next door and just hang out and watch Christmas shows on TV till dinner. After dinner it was time for a nap or a book and after that it was time for cookies, soda, coffee and gifts. I have tried to recreate this for my children and I think the magic is still there.
31. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive? In all honesty I am not sure.
32. If not now, then when? Now as I am working on setting as many doable goals as possible for this new year.
33. If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose? I have absolutely nothing to loose as I have already lost my mind.
34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever? Yes I have a few good friends like that.
35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars? Passion that one is right.
36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil? Not everything is black and white as there is a lot of gray areas and all men are both good and evil.
37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job? No I would not quit my job, but I would try to do more good.
38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing? As I am a stay at home mom I would love a real job which I guess would mean more work.
39. Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before? Yes, every day is pretty much the same for me. 
40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in? I am walking into the dark right now with a strong belief that moving to Norway is the right thing to do, but how our future there is going to be is still in the dark for us.
41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today? I would visit with my parents.
42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous? No, I would rather live 10 years longer to see my kids grow older and have families on their own.
43. What is the difference between being alive and truly living? When you are truly living you do things you enjoy doing and just being alive means living without passion.
44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right? Anytime.
45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake? People are naturally afraid of failing and find it embarrassing to fail, and in order to make a mistake you usually have to fail.
46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? I would find someone to babysit my kids just so I could exercise and tend to my hobbies.
47. When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing? Right now.
48. What do you love?  Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love? I love to create and many of my latest actions has been to create either by crafting or by baking and I have given most of it away expressing my love for people around me and for crafting and baking.
49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday?  What about the day before that?  Or the day before that? Most days probably not, but yesterday I took both girls to the local children’s museum and then out to eat donuts and I do believe I will remember that.
50. Decisions are being made right now.  The question is:  Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you? Some are made by others and some are made by me, that is how life is.

A New Year–New Hopes and Plans

I wish all my readers a Happy New Year.

May it be a blessed one for you.

Every year I start out with new hopes and new plans for my life, most of the time they disappear in becoming good intentions that fall flat. I was reflecting on why this happens and I think I know why.

I have never written my hopes and goals down ever so this year I will break my life down into bits and pieces and build goals on the different aspects of my life.

I will make one post per aspect and list my resolutions there with some inspiration to get it done found on pintrest.

Tips, tricks and encouragement is greatly appreciated as this will be a year of great changes for me and my family.

• We will be loosing our home soon and will have to find a temporary place to live.
• We will be moving to Norway this spring/summer with no jobs in sight as of now.
• We will be starting in new jobs this summer/fall in Norway and the kids will start in a new school/daycare.

Packing for a 7 week vacation

The birthday party is over and it was a huge success. The weather turned out beautiful and warm and the girls had a blast at the park playing in the spray park with all their friends. Afterwards I was exhausted as can be expected and yesterday I just stayed home cleaning my dining room and kitchen. Today I got to run errands all by myself as my hubby was home and took care of the home base, and I even got my hair done for the first time since March of last year. And now I have started packing.

We are going to be gone for about 7 weeks. I am travelling by myself with a 7 year old and a 2 year old. Needless to say that the less we need to bring the better it is. I am also contemplating bringing to Norway things that I won’t need this next year, but would like to have in Norway when I move there next summer. This is why we will bring very little clothes. 

I always try to start early when packing for a trip like this, but as with everything else I end up procrastinating. Knowing that I was going to write this post for Anti Procrastination Tuesday made me feel accountable to someone outside and actually got me started earlier than I would have otherwise.

I have been doing laundry for days now and all the kids clothes are clean. The first thing I did was putting all of Isabel’s clothes on our bed and sort them. She got to point out a few of her favorite clothes and I got to put away a few items that she has outgrown. Seriously that girl needs to stop growing, we just did this a month ago too.

For Isabel we picked out 5 t-shirts, 5 tank tops, 2 sweaters, 4 pairs of pants, 4 pairs of capris, 4 pairs of shorts, 2 skirts, 4 dresses and 1 wedding party dress, one fleece set, two pjs, socks and underwear. There will also be raingear, a jacket, shoes, sandals and rain boots.

For Sofie there will be 5 t-shirts, 5 tank tops, 2 long sleeve onsies, 3 long sleeve shirts, 1 blouse, 3 sets, 2 sweater jackets, 4 pairs of pants, 4 pairs of capris, 4 pairs of shorts, 4 dresses and 1 wedding party dress, one wool set, two pjs, socks and underwear/diapers. For her too there will be raingear, a jacket, shoes, sandals and rain boots.

For me there will be training clothes (I will stop procrastinating and start exercising), two pairs of pants, one pair of capris, two pairs of shorts, four t-shirts, 8 tank tops, one sweater, two cardigans, a skirt, a dress and a wedding party dress, socks and underwear. Raingear, a jacket, two pairs of shoes and sandals. I will have to buy rain boots when I get to Norway.

Here it is all stacked and ready to go into the bags.

 

What do you think? To much or to little? While we are in Aanderbakkan we will have to hand wash everything and we will be staying there for at least 4 weeks. I really hate packing as it is always so hard to know exactly how much to bring.

My Church

This is the church I grew up almost next door to. My dad got confirmed in that church; my aunt (dads sister) got married to her first husband there and had him laid to rest there when he died of cancer a month after their second child was born; my two oldest cousins were christened there; my parents got married there; I was christened, confirmed and married there; my oldest daughter was christened there; my dads parents were laid to rest there and my parents might some day too be laid to rest there.

This is my church. The church I was on the board for, working to save it from wear and tear. I helped decide on the colors of the new organ. This is the church that on a good Sunday would only have 10 people attending. This is where I left a part of my heart.

I will never move back to this little town, but I would like to show you pieces of where I am from. Pieces that shaped who I am today. My roots are strong and they are pulling on me to come back home to Norway. In only a few months I will be going home for the summer. Then I will be back here in the US again for almost a year before I move home for good.

This is where I am from. 

Saying NO…

If there is one thing I am not good at, it is saying NO.

It does come easy when it is my kids asking, almost to easy sometimes.

As soon as school started I knew I were in trouble. Mom groups asked me to volunteer, school PTA asked me to volunteer, friends wanted help, family wanted help, my kids needed me, my husband needed me and I had projects I wanted to do on my own too.

After a few weeks I was feeling stressed and anxious. I knew I had to do something about it. I had to learn to say no.

First I said no at church when they asked for more volunteers in the children ministry. It is my space and time during the weekend to have some quality time by myself without the children and it is precious to me.

Then I chose to only do volunteer services that would give me something either socially, creatively, or professionally. With moms groups I am a small group leader and I create a newsletter. At my daughters school I run a volunteer group that meet once a week to help teachers with projects for their classes, this gives me ideas to use myself when I go back to work as a teacher.

I have friends wanting my help with decorating and I have said yes to two just because I think it is fun and I get to do something socially and creative all at once. I also have friends who want me to arrange and host gatherings ever so often and I chose to say no as it was more stressful than enjoyable for me.

I am helping my mother in law clean her house once a week, but she gives back in form of a little pocket money and helping me with the kids. Still I had to say no to her when she wanted to help me by taking my oldest daughter three of the school nights. It just gave me more stress as she would fall behind on her Norwegian studies. Now Isabel gets picked up from school  by grandma two days a week and it is really nice for me.

I am slowly getting my schedule set and everything balanced out. Things are getting done and my stress and anxiety level is slowly going down.

How are you handling the stresses of the daily demands and requests? Are you good at saying no?

This week we are going camping. Well at least Jesse and Isabel are camping, while Sofie and I are mostly just driving. Due to Sofies doctor visit on Wednesday we will have to come home on Tuesday and then just drive back to the campsite on Wednesday after the doctor visit. That makes it four days of driving since we are going camping on Monday and coming home on Thursday.

It is all worth it though. I love the place we are camping, the tall trees, the ocean, the animals scurrying around, the ride there, the views and the peace. We have not gone camping for three years and Isabel is so excited. I am a little nervous of camping with Sofie since she is suffering from a congested nose and heart burn because of one of her antibiotics. Still I think it will be fine.

While we were in Norway we went for a long drive to visit the worlds biggest Troll and his wife. Seeing them made me think about out upcoming 9th anniversary. I want to grow old with my man, find a little farm in Norway, by the ocean to live at. Sitting side by side, looking out at the world, admiring our grandchildren. That it has already been nine years since we got married is almost hard to believe. Time flies. It has not been easy, but we have managed.

I really want to buy him something nice or make him something for our anniversary. This is the second year that I actually remember our day. The first time was last year and I got it a day late, but usually it is him remembering it and me forgetting it and hence me getting surprised every year. When Wednesday comes I want to be able to surprise him with something and I have three days to figure something out. I have a plan that involves either the traditional pottery or the contemporary leather gifts and cake from one of our favorite cake places.

It will be a busy week for me, but I will try to find time to relax, to read, to blog, to get some chores done.